His Song ‘Married in a Year’ Is a Runaway Meme. He’s Just Stoked People Are Singing Along
In today’s fast-paced digital world, posting a video of yourself is tantamount to signing an ironclad agreement that whatever happens next is far, far out of your control. And even if he didn’t know it at the time, Brendan Abernathy quickly learned that lesson last week when his mom sent him a cryptic text message: “I’m so glad you’re with friends right now.”
“I was like, ‘what?’ Abernathy tells Rolling Stone over zoom, hands stretched out above his blond hair. “So I open social media and I start scrolling. And I [get] a sinking feeling.”
On May 19, Abernathy, 28, posted a clip of himself performing his then-unreleased song, “Married in a Year,” in the middle of a crowd at Los Angeles’ Moroccan Lounge. “You’ll be married in a year in the suburbs/with a kid on the way in three/convincing yourself you’re living the American dream,” Abernathy sings to his rapt audience in the video, with cell phone flashlights illuminating his impassioned guitar strumming, vibrato vocals, and feet balancing on his tiptoes in time with the music.
Abernathy has been working as a singer-songwriter for over six years, releasing two country-twinged, indie folk pop albums, Single and in Love and Long Way Home, in 2022 and 2023. He posted the video to his TikTok as part of his regular music promotion. When it reached 50,000 views, he was thrilled beyond his wildest dreams. But the more it got, the more he realized people weren’t watching because they loved it. They were making fun of him .
In the twelve days since Abernathy first posted the video, it’s gotten over 20 million views, which doesn’t even begin to account for how that one line of lyrics has become a viral earworm on the app. His song has been parodied by comedy heavy hitters on the app like Mitsy, critiqued by Anthony Fantano, think-pieced by commentator Widlin Pierrevil, and recreated by countless TikTokers in videos that range anywhere from delightfully creative to downright cruel. But what surprised even the most caustic of commenters was when, instead of hiding from the attention, Abernathy began posting right along with them, explaining lyrics, playing the recorded version, even picking out his favorite jokes in the comments.
“I definitely had a sinking feeling, but I also felt very validated,” Abernathy says. “Having really never had anyone hate my art, it was weird. But also good art is gonna be divisive. This means I’m making art that is going to connect with the right people.”
Rolling Stone caught up with Abernathy to talk about the lead up to his viral moment, his decision to go along with the joke, and his honest hopes about his music finding the right audience.
It’s been a hell of a week for you, hasn’t it?
It’s been a whirlwind, obviously. Seven days ago, no one knew who I was. I’ve had a really small, passionate fan base for six years that I’ve just driven around and built it up. I mean, I played for two people in a yogurt shop a year ago in February. So the opportunity to reach more people is so exciting. And at the same time, when you’ve been that unknown, notoriety is crazy. It’s so jarring. It’s just not natural to be seen by that many people
How are you processing? And where are you calling from?
I’m calling from Georgia, which is where I’m from. I’m volunteering at a summer camp right now. I’m the camp musician. I’ve done it for three or four summers and it’s the best thing ever. You lead pop songs, like Shawn Mendes, Taylor Swift — my favorite artist — just really hard and fast, and kids are just going like crazy. But they don’t have their phones. So none of the high schoolers know that this is the biggest thing on the internet right now. They have no clue.
Talk me through the event that produced this video. Was it a house party, a show, what’s going on there?
The event has so much drama. The conspiracy theories about it are so funny to me. I’m an adult. I have to pay rent as a full time artist, selling sweatshirts and playing 200 capacity rooms, where sometimes nine people show up and sometimes they sell out, you know? So I have to tour a lot. It was a concert at the Moroccan Lounge where 200 people bought tickets and had the time of their life.
What was up with the circle? Why were people filming you in silence?
I care about connecting with people more than anything. I’m sharing songs that are very vulnerable and very central to my life and my insecurities. So I want the room to feel fully united, fully present in the moment. The circle is the last moment of the concert. So it’s out of context, because there’s an hour and 20 minutes leading up to it of high energy. And then at the end, I say, “Hey, I’d love to come out in the middle and play you the next song I’m releasing.”
I’ve done that circle, like 100 times at 100 different shows and every time I play an unreleased song, or a song that just came out. So people are, like, listening. They don’t know the words.
And the socks?
Yes, let us be clear, I have socks on. The dogs are not out. The socks are on.
Well, people seem to really be focusing on the way you’re standing on your toes in the video. Is there a reason you do that while performing?
I guess passion? Love? I use a loop pedal, and I’m not ashamed of the fact that I don’t wear shoes on stage because I have horrible coordination. Awful. I have to hit the pedals correctly or it sounds horrible, so I just wear socks so I can feel them.
The funny thing is that as I usually put my shoes on to go in the middle of the circle. This time, I stepped over them, and I was like, “Whatever.” I vividly remember thinking, “I should put my shoes on. Enh, it doesn’t matter.”
After you realized people were making fun of you online, what made you decide to double down on posting?
I think the main thing that was jarring was the notoriety overnight, not the less positive comments. When you’ve been making the same type of music for six years, when you’ve been performing it the same way, when you’ve seen it connect with people, nothing on a screen is going to deter me or convince me that it doesn’t work. And part of the thing that I do to connect with people is I’m a little awkward and I make fun of myself. So the fact that other people are making fun of me is great. People parodying my songs, to me, is a huge compliment that the song is catchy enough and good enough that they want to recreate it.
The lyrics have been up for a ton of debate since you posted. Can you walk me through the story behind the song?
I have no game. At the time of writing the song, I had taken seven girls on dates, who the very next person they went out with, they married. When you’re trying to fall in love and then it doesn’t work out, it can be easy to tell yourself that it’s because the other person wasn’t ready for it. But in my case, the person clearly was ready for it and so the problem has to be me. And that’s a devastating reality. The song is me grappling through my insecurity and comparing myself to other people in the lives they’re living.
The tag that’s gone viral was the very first lyric I wrote for the whole album. I wrote it in February of 2023 and then wrote the album for a year and recorded it for six months — because I had to make enough money to record the album through touring and selling sweatshirts. We’re constantly comparing ourselves to other people and to the standard our culture gives us, which is a fake standard, and that’s the point of the song. That’s the point of the whole album. Which is why I think it’s so sick that this is the part that blew up, because the whole album is exploring how, no matter what we do, we feel like something’s off.
Who would you say some of your biggest musical influences are?
Of course, Taylor Swift. I grew up listening to Jim Croce, James Taylor. Jimmy Buffett was my first two concerts. HAIM. More recently, Holly Humberstone, Griff. British women really run my life.
Speaking of conspiracy theories — did you know some people online think you’re faking your love of Swift so her fans will come to your aid?
Are you serious? You’re joking.
I am not joking. The Swifties can be very powerful allies
I will somehow figure out how to charge my old Xenon freaking slide phone that has a video of me at the Fearless Tour with Keith Urban. I have a Taylor Swift Diet Coke can [that] one of my friends got me at the 1989 tour because I couldn’t go because I was on a retreat. My old password was…
I believe you, I believe you. What has it been like to have their support?
I’m hoping they keep coming because I am, genuinely, so one of them. I mean, I cover “Getaway Car” every single show.
Going viral is one thing, but it doesn’t guarantee this moment will have longevity. What’s the ideal goal you want to come out of this? How are you feeling?
I’ve worked for a moment like this for a long time. I’ve played over 600 shows. I’ve slept on over 1,000 couches. I’ve driven 200,000 miles alone in my car. I really dedicated myself to connecting with people, and so I’m really grateful that I’m getting to connect with more people through the internet. I am definitely scared, or fearful. There’s just so much unknown that comes with it and that unknown is scary. But really bluntly, I’m also very optimistic and hopeful. I believe in “Married in a Year” and I believe in the album that’s coming out after it. And I am confident anyone that listens to it will at least have an opinion.
